Saturday, March 8, 2014

Beware Of Frisbee's

Everyone has those stories from their past that they just love to share, don't they? So you have a story that stand out as particularly funny or dramatic, that come up time and time again? Well I do, so I thought that maybe you would like to hear one of my best party stories.

Freshman year of high school I met a guy who would become a very dear friend of mine. We never dated, we couldn't have been more opposite, but we just became great friends. His mom worked at the school, and I would assume that she was the reason our lockers always ended up next to each other and our lunch period was always at the same time. Throughout the four years that we spent together, I would eat breakfast at his house before school, borrow lunch money from him pretty much every single day, and do all the crazy stuff together that high schoolers do, such as trick or treating (was that just us?), and attending school functions. One of my most terrifying high school experiences came with he decided to show me how he could do donuts in the school parking lot with his truck. My head has never come so near to a light pole in my life. In fact, we were so oddly "coupled" up that one day his girlfriend approached him and said "my friends see you carrying Eden's books to class everyday and they think you are dating." He told her that her friends were stupid, she gave him the ultimatum to stop walking me to class or she would break up with him, and he broke up with her. We weren't anything, and yet, we were something.

Sorry, bad quality, I had to take a picture of a picture.

But what that something was, what it transpired into, was a freaking awesome duo in gym class. He was a big dude, a foot taller than me, built solidly, and well trained on the football team. When we played floor hockey, we dominated. He would run my defense and I would run behind him, to which he would jump out of my way as soon as we got to the net, and I would score. We were so great that the teacher finally split us up because she said we were an unfair advantage. We played like this in sport after sport, dominating the field in hockey, soccer, basketball, and more.

But then we got to ultimate Frisbee. Does anyone know how heavy and hard a regulation Frisbee is? Let me tell you, I didn't, not until I got hit in the head with one anyways. The first day of Frisbee the teacher tells us that we are just going to be partnering up and tossing the Frisbee back and forth for practice. Big dude and I team up as usual, walk to opposite sides of the field, and then he throws the Frisbee at me like we are in the middle of one of his football games. I swear to you, I didn't even see the thing until I'm lying in the grass and its lying next to me. He came running over and he's all "Eden OHMYGOSHAREYOUOK!!!" and I'm all "...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................Uh.............................................................................................................................................................................................................what the hell just happened?"

"I hit you with the Frisbee!! I'm so sorry!!" he said. I was ok, but I walked around for the rest of the day with a long rectangular welt in the middle of my forehead.

The next day in gym class we partner up again and he promises me that he is going to throw the Frisbee to me like I am the 100 pounds that I am, and not one of his football buddies. He crosses to the other side of the field, the teacher calls my name, I turn around, and BAM!!! The Frisbee slams into the back of my head hard enough to drop me to my knees. Big dude comes running over and with one hand yanks me up so fast that I about pole vault over him. I'm not smiling, while he on the other hand, is trying not to laugh. The teacher says "that's it, you guys aren't partners anymore."

The next day he gets the chance to partner up with the girl he had a crush on, while I ironically get partnered up with a guy that I end up going to homecoming with. I'm not paying attention to the two of them because I am too busy flirting, until I hear "someone run and get the nurse!" I look over and big dude's crush is lying on the grass. Yep, you guessed it! He comes running over to me, "Eden, I hit her! I hit her with the Frisbee. I can't believe I did that!" and I'm all "wait, boy, hold up. You seem a lot more distraught over your cute little wanna-be-girlfriend lying in the grass over there THAN WHEN IT WAS YOUR BEST FRIEND, who you hit TWICE I might add, and laughed at!" He is all "Eden, FOCUS!! How do I fix this!" Well, for starters, how about you stop hitting girls in the head with regulation Frisbee's? Cuz, uh, that seems obvious enough.

This is pretty much exactly how I envision him throwing a Frisbee
With all that chaos and drama, the next day the teacher told big dude that she was going to be his partner. I don't even know what to tell you guys, but somehow, big dude hit the teacher with the Frisbee. (You saw that coming, right?) That right there ended his Frisbee season, as he was benched for the rest of gym class Frisbee.

After that, the whole Frisbee thing became a running joke between us. "Or what, you will hit me with a Frisbee?" was tossed around by me, while "don't make me Frisbee you," was thrown around by him quite a bit. Big dude swore his Frisbee days were over and made a pact with me that he would never touch another Frisbee for as long as he lived.

Apparently we were proud he was wearing a belt. I can't remember what this was about. I'm also thankful I don't remember wearing those tragic overalls.

At the end of our high school career, he went off to Valparaiso University in Indiana to play football. One day I got a phone call from my other best friend, whom we will call Ashley, who went to school in Oklahoma. Ashley's school was traveling to Indiana to play a football game against the Valpo team, and she was traveling with them to cheer.

"Hey, I'm going to Valpo," she told me. "That's where your hot big dude friend goes, isn't it? Text him and tell him I'm coming and maybe we can meet up after the game" she told me.

A few days later, I got a phone call from Ashley that started out with "Eden, I'm at the school clinic. I was at the game, I was sitting on a bleacher bench, and some big dude hit me in the head with a Frisbee! I have a huge welt on my head and I totally wanted to see your hot friend tonight! I seriously can't believe that this is happening, it hit me so hard I fell off the bleachers! What is wrong with the people at this school? Who does that?"

People, I could not make this up if I tried. I COULD NOT MAKE THIS UP IF I TRIED. As I am on the phone with her, I see that big dude is beeping in on the other line. I tell her to hold on, and I answer his call.

"Eden, I only have a second, I'm in the locker room, but you will never guess what happened!!!??" At this point I'm thinking, yea, I'm starting to have a pretty good idea. "I broke the pact! I don't know what I was thinking! I was running down the sidelines, someone threw a Frisbee onto the field, and without thinking I just picked it up and chucked it back into the stands. I looked up just in time to see it knock some totally hot chick backwards off the bench!"

No. Freaking. Way.

I am happy to report, that several years have gone by, big dude and I are still friends, he is happily married with a second baby on the way, and I have thoroughly warned his wife to never let him near a Frisbee again.




Photo Credit Guy Throwing Frisbee: https://www.flickr.com/photos/claudiocigna/

27 comments:

  1. Great story. Thanks for sharing! "Sounds crazy but..." stories are the best kind. :)

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    1. Lol, now you guys need to share some with me!

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  2. That's just brilliant. Kinda ridiculous, but brilliant.

    On another note, I have a question; I notice that you are pretty damned good at choosing friends, yet seem to choose either terrible people to have "relationships" with, or people that just aren't right for you. I wonder if that's something you've given any thought to. Otherwise, hilarious story.

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    1. That my friend, is a very interesting question that I have never before thought of. I am going to need to mull over this for a while. My first response? I apparently am only attracted to people who treat me like shit. I think its what is familiar to me and ridiculously comfortable. The one's that are nice to me make me uncomfortable as so I keep them at a distance.

      I'm going to have to think about this for a while.

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  3. Loved this story! You do seem to have some awesome friends...perhaps because you are an awesome friend, too!? I just bet that is true!
    As to your Ultimate frisbee stories, my son has played Ultimate his whole college career (he is a grad student and has been there 7 years). As a child we called him our little AWH (accident waiting to happen) because he was always getting hurt and going to the ER. He has always played sports but is not a big guy so getting hit in soccer can have bad consequences...but nothing has been as bad as Ultimate (which I must add he loves and is very good at!). He has hurt ankles, had concussions, had to have hip surgery due to a torn labral ligament and, most recently, completely broke a front tooth in half by getting hit in the mouth by the frisbee! Ultimate is not a sport for the faint of heart and competition frisbees are not toys, especially in the hands of a skilled (or very strong!) player! You were lucky you weren't put in the hospital with your little bitty self being hit by his hard throw!

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    1. Aw thanks :)

      Yes!! They are so hard! I was shocked when I first saw one. Its like throwing a heavy tupperware serving tray at someone. Yikes ((shudders)) I don't know how you, as his mom, were able to watch his games. I would be freaking out and hiding under the bleachers unable to look lol. Oh what I have to look forward to with me son. Maybe I'll get lucky and he will be like a competitive chess player haha

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    2. Actually I have not watched most of his Ultimate games since they were played either at his college or on the road...the few I have watched have been a bit stressful, especially when I see hin sky a catch (he is 5'9") against a much heavier 6'5" guy! Yikes!

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  4. What lesson have we learned today, kids? If you see a really tall guy holding a frisbee, run.

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  5. Hahahaha my cheeks are aching here, I can't stop laughing! If he go visit you, say you have some neighbors who would love to play frisbee with him.

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    1. HAHAHAHAHA That is the BEST idea I have ever heard. He lives like 20 minutes from me now, he moved back after college. I should totally set something up with him and the neighbors. Heck they don't even have to play. Him and I could be playing (me in a helmet of course) and we could just wait for them to come out and get the mail or something. BAM! They would never know what hit them. Literally.

      I do believe I like the way you think my friend :)

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    2. Don't forget the faceguard!

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    3. I LIKE this idea. Call him and set up that Frisbee date.....and definitely yes to the helmet! Post pictures of the 'dazed' neighbors (insert evil chuckle here!)

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    4. Hahaha!! I have a mad evil laugh going on over here. The wheels are turning in my brain.....

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  6. Hahaha, that's kind of hilarious. I guess I'll stay away from big guys with frisbees. ;)

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  7. Great story. It's a shame that you two never got past the friendship stage.... obviously keeping Frisbees out of the relationship would have needed to be written in stone. ♡

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    1. True that sista.

      Luckily he found himself a great wife, which self admittedly must have been hard after I set the standard..... hehe

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  8. This is by far the funniest story that I've read in a real long while. Thank you for brightening up a very, VERY long day.

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  9. OK! this story had me in tears all day yesterday!! i had the stupid giggles at work and had a big creepy smile on my face all day thanks to you lol!!! ugh!

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    1. Hahaha!! Now that makes me laugh lol. :)

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  10. I grew up with rough guys, not mean, just rough...hey I wanted to play with them, I guess I had to put up with their roughness - and yeah, they looked out for me too.

    Road hockey in the rainy fall? - ball whipped at I don't know what speed, but fast enough to leave marks (OK, I always had to be goalie)...riding bikes in the summer, see who can make the fastest turn? - scratch out half my thigh...Long jump, on a slant? - slid across someone's driveway, scraped out half my knee - only remember the Guys say "Oh", not one of them helped me up (I only think they were in awe of my wipe-out) one did ask if I was OK - couldn't walk properly for weeks, and still bare the scar!

    But hang out by the curb late on a warm summer's night, talk about life and growing up - and perhaps steal a kiss;) They were always there-

    They were the best guys ever...my "Frisbee" friends ;}

    Nathalie
    xoxoxox

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    1. I'm glad you have some great memories to look back on as well :)

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    2. And I'm glad you kept in touch with your "frisbee" friend :) They really are the best! I just up and left, because my father was way too much for me...nobody knew I was moving - not even my family! I often think of those guys, wonder where they're at now...I never even said goodbye...bad choice on my part :(

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